I am really starting to think I have that seasonal depression or something. It has never been that noticeable until I moved to Boone. However the weather is so gross up here most of the winter I can't help but feel blah on rainy cold days. Today is one of those rainy cold gross days. Work was fine actually pretty good. We got to go on some rainy day walks which always makes the day go by faster. Ever since I got home I have been in one of those blah moods. And even though I hate to admit it Jeff has been on my mind because today should have been his first day of work in Colorado. I am happy to say that this is the last date that I know about Jeff. Hopefully nothing else comes up that will bother me date wise. I have been trying everything I know to distract myself and cheer myself up but nothing seems to be helping. I still feel blah.... It has got to be this damn weather... its so gross outside! I have been watching the TV show Felicity on netflixs. One of the characters is torn between an ex and a new girl and he made a comment talking to the new girl about how just because he has feelings for a new person doesn't mean he doesn't mean he doesn't still have feelings for the ex. When I heard that it kind of hit me like a ton of bricks. Even though I am starting to feel more like me again and taking baby steps forward I will still have feelings for Jeff. I probably will for the rest of my life considering everything that happened. I guess I am just suppose to suppress those feelings the best I can and think about something else? I think I am just being more sensitive about this because I started my period today. Blah being a girl blows haha! Ugg I wish I could just lay in the sun at the beach!
This is a picture of my sisters and I from a few years ago at the beach. Look at how nice and tan I am!
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